7 Mantras Every Single Mom Should Be Living In 2018
Because who has time for resolutions?
Being a single mom isn’t easy. Can we all just take a minute to acknowledge that? Mainly because in the real world, it’s unlikely anyone will lend a minute, or even a second, to pat you on the back and say job well done.
Yes, single moms can never fully embrace the “me first” attitude that New Year’s resolutions are built on, but there are other ways to make 2018 your year. Here’s how:
1. Do more of the things you love
The more you spend your time doing things that lift your spirits, the happier you’ll feel.
Find bits and pieces of the person you were before carpooling and bottle feeding took over your life.
2. See the bigger picture
Remember that everyone who came in to your life was there for a reason. That reason might be difficult to see when you’re wholly immersed in intense feelings.
But there is a reason.
So instead of revisiting the past and trying to figure out how you could have avoided heartache, learn how to let go and see the bigger picture.
Because it is in this space of letting go where true growth - and happiness - is found.
3. Take care of yourself
It’s hard to find the time to date - but that doesn’t mean you should give up the part of yourself that craves a romantic connection.
There’s proof in numbers - 44% of women on dating sites are single moms. So it is possible to strike that balance, you just have to know how to use the tools at your disposal and use them right.
The dating site Zoosk is a great option. Their matching tool continuously learns your likes and dislikes and suggests matches accordingly. So the more you use it, the better it understands what you’re looking for.
And they take safety very seriously, with photo verification software which ensures that any photo uploaded to the site is the real deal - so you'll never have to wonder if the person you’re speaking with is too good to be true.
Another favorite is Elite Singles, which uses a personality profile to make better matches. If you do go the online dating route, make sure the site you choose is the right one for you - it can mean all the difference.
4. Keep an open heart
If you decide to put yourself out there, sign up for online dating, and then proceed to take all your emotional baggage along with you on your dates, you’ll be so bogged down that you won’t get very far.
When you come to terms with your past relationships and are ready to move forward with a healthy outlook, you’ll be surprised at how much easier and pain-free the search will be.
Don’t let your previous relationships and heartbreak influence your potential relationships.
5. Realize that you have your limits
None of us can do everything on our own. Instead of trudging along with a relentless “can do” attitude in your head, allow yourself to accept help when you need it - whether it’s from family and friends or other moms from school.
Accepting help doesn’t make you less capable. It makes you better able to be the best mother.
6. Be present
Single moms are world class multitaskers. So when you do have a spare moment to spend with your children, try to be fully present. Put aside your phone or laptop and turn off any work emails and embrace that quality time.
7. Stop and breathe
Feeling overwhelmed is par for the course. But every now and then it’s important to take a deep breath and acknowledge everything you have to be grateful for. And realize that you’ve got this.
One last piece of advice before you go: If you're ready to give online dating a try, head to a site like Zoosk, whose smart matching and ease of use just might be the key to making it work for you.